Controversial Is dating really as hard as some people say it is?

So this thread is back? For a moment I thought it was a new one.

Some of you are hilarious, specially @Logiko, as usual.

I'd give advice for those struggling but I think I already did so a while ago on this thread. Either way, sincere good luck with your endeavours, whatever they might be.

No advice for @Okamakama, man's already winning.
Cheers my guy. I'm very happy in my relationship. I think there is nothing more fulfilling than a long-term partnership where you both know everything about the other. It's at the point where I just know whatever she's doing is likely in our collective best interest so I'm happy. She needs money for something in the house? I just leave my wallet on the table. I trust her that much.

We'll be trying for kids very soon (starting in October). Hoping to have three. Twins run in her family, so that's something that might be around the corner, lol.
 
Cheers my guy. I'm very happy in my relationship. I think there is nothing more fulfilling than a long-term partnership where you both know everything about the other. It's at the point where I just know whatever she's doing is likely in our collective best interest so I'm happy. She needs money for something in the house? I just leave my wallet on the table. I trust her that much.

We'll be trying for kids very soon (starting in October). Hoping to have three. Twins run in her family, so that's something that might be around the corner, lol.
One might say you might speed-run having three. :milaugh:

In all seriousness, that's wonderful. Hope to be hearing good news from you.
 
The humiliation ritual is basically putting your heart out there, doing everything and still being rejected and treated like dirt. It happens to some men.
Yes, it happens, that's part of life, you will not always encounter good people. But we need to move on instead of generalizing one or two bad experience to the entirerity of relationships.

it is kind of true that the dating market favours women
Not, its not true.
Because what you don't see, is that women are also suffering from a high % of loneliness.
Second, women face a choice when they date men as there is a DOCUMENTED % that they can end up with either:
- someone toxic
- someone violent
- someone who could kill them

So instead of thinking that women have a lot of choice, sink in the idea that this is actually not the case in reality.

Women are risking statistically MUCH MORE than men in dating.

Unfortunately, most of the above, especially the latter, is something individuals within incel communities tend to lack. Not mocking them, honestly, it's a sad lot they have.
Yes, because the problem with the incel community is that they do not only hate women, they also hate themself and reject the responsability on women.

So lets not enable this idea that men have it harder. This is not the case.

Dating takes courage, but this is not the hard part. The hard part is everything that you do before in order to be someone that will respect a potential partner as much as possible.


Some of you are hilarious, specially @Logiko, as usual.
There is nothing "hilarious" with what I say. Those are pretty basic advices.

:luuh:
 
What do you find hilarious ?
Look at what you write and how different you are from everyone and imagine for a moment you could be wrong.

That is why it's hilarious.
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He could totally date if he wanted to. Trust. He's very reliable. For example, you know for certain he's going to send you a long response when you just make a meme comment. :gokulaugh:
 

K!NG HARA$H!MA

Hustlerversity Graduate
I think I can answer some of his questions. I've read into the incel community, and his words are reminiscent of things on 4chan. The humiliation ritual is basically putting your heart out there, doing everything and still being rejected and treated like dirt. It happens to some men.

Unfortunately, it is kind of true that the dating market favours women. Be that as it may, a reliable guy can charm women just fine. Just have good hygiene, actually care about what she's saying (if it's actually interesting, nothing is worse than faux interest), and show that you can be there when it counts. Confidence goes a long way.

Unfortunately, most of the above, especially the latter, is something individuals within incel communities tend to lack. Not mocking them, honestly, it's a sad lot they have.
A lot of talk about confidence but what is confidence without affirmation and validation from others?


How long can One self-Cope about self confidence WITHOUT one single soul acknowledging and even give little praises about your efforts?


Imagine if you got the looks, you'll be getting called hot, flirted.

That's a massive self-boost and level up confidence


Imagine if you got the weatlh, you'll he called rich and shit.

That's a massive self boost and level up confidence


And then

People Gaslighting about how good your personality is only to get frienzoned..


That ain't shit
 
Look at what you write and how different you are from everyone and imagine for a moment you could be wrong.

That is why it's hilarious.
Because I'm the only one here saying that everyone has a chance as long as you treat yourself and women with respect ?

That's what you find "so different" and "hilarious" ? And you are trying to make me reconsider ?

Do you realize what you are saying here ?


He could totally date if he wanted to. Trust. He's very reliable.
Well, yeah.. that's what I did before my condition, I don't know why it would be different now ... and I'm really not the most beautiful looking guys on the planet.

I think you guys are just defeatist and finding excuses ..


My man Logiko seems to think that looks don't matter.
Of course it matter, its helps, but he does not do the majority of the work.


But reality doesn't matter now ? Who are you and what did you do to MY Logiko ?
There is a problem of loneliness in the world. This is multi factorial. But this has nothing to do with the assertion "women only date good looking men", that's nonsense.

Again, I'm not that good lookin and I have dated gorgeous women. Did my face stopped me from asking them out ?

Of course not. And the best thing is that none of those relationship ended badly or because of who I was as a person.

Be yourself, love yourself, respect others, and there is no reasons that people should reject you in "real" life if you have common interests.
 
Cheers my guy. I'm very happy in my relationship. I think there is nothing more fulfilling than a long-term partnership where you both know everything about the other. It's at the point where I just know whatever she's doing is likely in our collective best interest so I'm happy. She needs money for something in the house? I just leave my wallet on the table. I trust her that much.

We'll be trying for kids very soon (starting in October). Hoping to have three. Twins run in her family, so that's something that might be around the corner, lol.
You got advice for a long distance relationship?
 
Of course it matter, its helps, but he does not do the majority of the work.
That’s kinda true for romantic relationships. Untrue if you’re in your twenties and want to fuck around

There is a problem of loneliness in the world. This is multi factorial. But this has nothing to do with the assertion "women only date good looking men", that's nonsense.

Again, I'm not that good lookin and I have dated gorgeous women. Did my face stopped me from asking them out ?

Of course not. And the best thing is that none of those relationship ended badly or because of who I was as a person.

Be yourself, love yourself, respect others, and there is no reasons that people should reject you in "real" life if you have common interests.
I don’t think they date only good looking men or whatever.

But did you ever downgrade or upgrade your looks ? I mean that’s usually where people find out how much looks matter.
 
Be yourself, love yourself, respect others, and there is no reasons that people should reject you in "real" life if you have common interests.
i already said this before but "be yourself" is probably the worst advice to give to someone who struggles to date because clearly it isn't working lmao
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you will never be loved
 
What do you find hilarious ?
I didn't want to explain the joke, but, since you insist.

It's simply funny when a guy who hasn't dated in 14 years gives advice on dating and talks about how easy dating is nowadays. It's even better when he speaks as a sort of "bearer of the truth" that minimizes the struggles of many single men by telling them it all comes down to "don't be toxic", which is a very generic claim when we take into account that "toxic" could mean different things to different people. If by that you meant "Don't be violent with your partner" or something of the sort, then that's obvious, yet not really helpful for someone who can't find or keep a date.

Then there was some more minimization of men's struggles by bringing up data on women's safety struggles, which are a different topic and have no real bearing on their "lack of choice". They choosing poorly doesn't mean they don't have plenty of choices.

Overall, last page was pretty funny. Thank you.

Yes, confidence is important. Yes, one shouldn't limit his own choices and one shouldn't be a defeatist. Yes, Harashima is an incel. That much is true. There are, however, plenty of other factors for someone else to be interested in you, and looks are a big factor. Being real doesn't equate to giving up.

I think you guys are just defeatist and finding excuses ..
Telling that to Okamakama of all people is also an hilarious choice.


That being said, good luck with your mental struggles.
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You got advice for a long distance relationship?
Are you on one?
 
That’s kinda true for romantic relationships. Untrue if you’re in your twenties and want to fuck around
What do you think I did in my 20's ?


But did you ever downgrade or upgrade your looks ? I mean that’s usually where people find out how much looks matter.
I'm always questionning my look (or rather I was, I'm not in a sitaution where this matter anymore), and of course looks matter and sometimes people will reject you based on look, but those people will be mostly men.

Talk to women guys, you might find out that looks is not really their first priority in relationships.


i already said this before but "be yourself" is probably the worst advice to give to someone who struggles to date because clearly it isn't working lmao
I also said "love yourself and respect others", if be yourself neglect the other two then of course, you need to change lol.


It's simply funny when a guy who hasn't dated in 14 years gives advice on dating and talks about how easy dating is nowadays.
Things have not really changed that much in 14 years, people are simply a little bit less interested with relationship maybe due to COVID, but that's all.


that minimizes the struggles of many single men by telling them it all comes down to "don't be toxic"
Yeah, don't be toxic. If you are you will have hard time finding or staying in healthy relationships.

Meeting new people can be done in various different ways as long as you have the capacities to put the effort into searching to meet other people.


hich is a very generic claim when we take into account that "toxic" could mean different things to different people
Well of course it depends on who you want to be with.


If by that you meant "Don't be violent with your partner" or something of the sort, then that's obvious
Not for a lot of men.


yet not really helpful for someone who can't find or keep a date.
That's why I also add those advices :

- Love yourself
- Know yourself
- Listen to the need of others and respect them

You can enter a relationship a do none of those things. This is a recipy for disaster.

If you want "techniques", there are none. People are not machines and people are different and want different things. That's why you only need those few advices and your own courage.


Then there was some more minimization of men's struggles by bringing up data on women's safety struggles
Actually here, the problem is the minimization of women's struggle and the stereotipization of women. So get that incel rethoric out. When someone is telling "women have more rights" to justify the fact that men are struggling to find relationships, I consider it logical and moral to remind everyone that those who are ACTUALLY struggle FOR REAL, are the women and not the men.

If you have a problem with that, then, I can understand why you find that funny, we its telling more about you than about me :)

As usual on this forum lol...

Telling that to Okamakama of all people is also an hilarious choice.


That being said, good luck with your mental struggles.
:kata:
 
What do you think I did in my 20's ?



I'm always questionning my look (or rather I was, I'm not in a sitaution where this matter anymore), and of course looks matter and sometimes people will reject you based on look, but those people will be mostly men.

Talk to women guys, you might find out that looks is not really their first priority in relationships.



I also said "love yourself and respect others", if be yourself neglect the other two then of course, you need to change lol.



Things have not really changed that much in 14 years, people are simply a little bit less interested with relationship maybe due to COVID, but that's all.



Yeah, don't be toxic. If you are you will have hard time finding or staying in healthy relationships.

Meeting new people can be done in various different ways as long as you have the capacities to put the effort into searching to meet other people.



Well of course it depends on who you want to be with.



Not for a lot of men.



That's why I also add those advices :

- Love yourself
- Know yourself
- Listen to the need of others and respect them

You can enter a relationship a do none of those things. This is a recipy for disaster.

If you want "techniques", there are none. People are not machines and people are different and want different things. That's why you only need those few advices and your own courage.



Actually here, the problem is the minimization of women's struggle and the stereotipization of women. So get that incel rethoric out. When someone is telling "women have more rights" to justify the fact that men are struggling to find relationships, I consider it logical and moral to remind everyone that those who are ACTUALLY struggle FOR REAL, are the women and not the men.

If you have a problem with that, then, I can understand why you find that funny, we its telling more about you than about me :)

As usual on this forum lol...


:kata:
Bro, you can't deny the fact that there is a lot of people who try to date and simply fails
 
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