The ascended match-ups be like:
Usopp VS Compote
Nami/Robin VS Ulti/Black Maria
Franky VS Daifuku and then Sasaki
Brook VS Oven and then Who's-Who
Chopper VS Perospero and then Page One
Jimbei VS Smoothie and then Jack
Sanji VS Queen
Zoro VS King
Luffy VS Big Mom and then Kaido
Back when Yamcha, Kuririn, Tenshinhan, and Chaozu were "relevant," did they ever beat the important guys of the Red Ribbon Army and Demon King Piccolo's sons? Most Red Ribbon Army officers were either beaten by Goku or a crossover character. Tambourine was killed by Goku, and Tenshinhan needed his ass saved from Drum. FFS, Yajirobe beat Piccolo's other son and ate him.
If Viz Media had dubbed that anime about a super hero school that has a little boy who shouts, "watashi ga kita!" a lot in it, they better get Jimmy Neutron's VA to voice the frog girl.
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maybe wear embarrassing avatars if you want something extreme find other people who want something extreme