Yeah, there’s an elephant in the room. And I ain’t talking about Zunesha.
The elephant in the room is named Stupidity, and it seems as though a good chunk of the One Piece fandom has come down with the same sickness.
First, it was Ivankov. Due to a minor fan mistranslation, everyone and their senile grandmas were speculating that Ivankov, yes that Ivankov had somehow managed to reach Onigashima for absolutely no reason other than Sanji had a facial expression....? Sabo’s in some deep shit, but sure, yeah. Ivankov’s coming to Wano for some reason.
Despite mountains of evidence to the contrary, Stupidity persisted. Stupidity would not go down without a fight. There was no possible way that it was just Black Maria and her gang that Sanji overheard!!
It clearly was Ivankov, setting up the Revolutionaries invasion of Onigashima because reasons.... Because, hype.
After it was revealed that it really was just Black Maria’s minions that Sanji overheard, did this deter Stupidity and her kin from making more pointless and baseless speculation? Of course not.
Somewhere along the way, the term “theory” was commandeered by this elephant named Stupidity and this bitch has decided to try her hand at yet another random, irrational speculation.
The person in question this time you may ask? Why, it’s none other than the false god Enel from the milquetoast Skypeia Arc! Don’t ask me how or why Enel would even be on Onigashima during the raid, let alone crying in anguish over the defeat of the Akazaya Nine.
Maybe... Well, no... This would be silly... But maybe
Enel is crying because:
Kin’emon owes him 10 buck
-Kiku and Izo owe him a Mormon moped
-Raizou is his brothers wife’s sisters cousins godson
-Denjiro was his old army buddy back in ‘Nam
-Kawamatsu once shared half a Coke with him
-He had a small start up with Ashura Douji in the 90s
-Inu and Neko were his old friends in the old country
If you couldn’t tell, this is bullshit. And needless to say, having to even pretend to believe that Enel is the silhouette crying over the Scabbards has literally left me in such a state that I feel like I just received a lobotomy with a rusted button hook.
What will the legacy of our fandom be if we continue to allow the dirt eaters and gorilla glue drinkers to voice their wrong opinions about a Japanese children’s book? What will we tell our grandchildren when they look back on these archived posts and see that we allowed people to spout such obvious bullshit? Ah my friends, as the late great Napoleon Shakespeare once said, the issue at hand is the tissue at hand.
I know it’s too much to ask and this will probably fall on deaf ears to nearly everyone because I didn’t mention Zoro once in this thread but...
Can we like please please pleaaaaase use common sense from now on?
Like, can we invite common sense over to chill sometime guys?
Maybe experiment with common sense one night after a beer or two?
Maybe, let common sense move in?
Maybe throw around the idea of getting a timeshare in Miami with common sense?
Maybe? No? Okay.
Anyways, I have my pitchforks ready to drive the Enel truthers out of the fandom. Let me know if any of you are down.
The elephant in the room is named Stupidity, and it seems as though a good chunk of the One Piece fandom has come down with the same sickness.
First, it was Ivankov. Due to a minor fan mistranslation, everyone and their senile grandmas were speculating that Ivankov, yes that Ivankov had somehow managed to reach Onigashima for absolutely no reason other than Sanji had a facial expression....? Sabo’s in some deep shit, but sure, yeah. Ivankov’s coming to Wano for some reason.
Despite mountains of evidence to the contrary, Stupidity persisted. Stupidity would not go down without a fight. There was no possible way that it was just Black Maria and her gang that Sanji overheard!!
It clearly was Ivankov, setting up the Revolutionaries invasion of Onigashima because reasons.... Because, hype.
After it was revealed that it really was just Black Maria’s minions that Sanji overheard, did this deter Stupidity and her kin from making more pointless and baseless speculation? Of course not.
Somewhere along the way, the term “theory” was commandeered by this elephant named Stupidity and this bitch has decided to try her hand at yet another random, irrational speculation.
The person in question this time you may ask? Why, it’s none other than the false god Enel from the milquetoast Skypeia Arc! Don’t ask me how or why Enel would even be on Onigashima during the raid, let alone crying in anguish over the defeat of the Akazaya Nine.
Maybe... Well, no... This would be silly... But maybe
Enel is crying because:
Kin’emon owes him 10 buck
-Kiku and Izo owe him a Mormon moped
-Raizou is his brothers wife’s sisters cousins godson
-Denjiro was his old army buddy back in ‘Nam
-Kawamatsu once shared half a Coke with him
-He had a small start up with Ashura Douji in the 90s
-Inu and Neko were his old friends in the old country
If you couldn’t tell, this is bullshit. And needless to say, having to even pretend to believe that Enel is the silhouette crying over the Scabbards has literally left me in such a state that I feel like I just received a lobotomy with a rusted button hook.
What will the legacy of our fandom be if we continue to allow the dirt eaters and gorilla glue drinkers to voice their wrong opinions about a Japanese children’s book? What will we tell our grandchildren when they look back on these archived posts and see that we allowed people to spout such obvious bullshit? Ah my friends, as the late great Napoleon Shakespeare once said, the issue at hand is the tissue at hand.
I know it’s too much to ask and this will probably fall on deaf ears to nearly everyone because I didn’t mention Zoro once in this thread but...
Can we like please please pleaaaaase use common sense from now on?
Like, can we invite common sense over to chill sometime guys?
Maybe experiment with common sense one night after a beer or two?
Maybe, let common sense move in?
Maybe throw around the idea of getting a timeshare in Miami with common sense?
Maybe? No? Okay.
Anyways, I have my pitchforks ready to drive the Enel truthers out of the fandom. Let me know if any of you are down.
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