Today the world is filled with 'content creators' who want 'opportunities' and to me it seems like most of this stuff is replacable nonsense. But those 'creators' act like attention hoes, wanting to be noticed so badly, wantiing to prove that their 'existence matters' or whatever.
People are living as if the entertainment industry were a necessary part of life when it is mostly a money making machine for the big names.
Lowkey tired of all this
Completely agree, very well said! Couldn't have said it better myself! People are becoming so spritiually, mentally, emotionally devoid, lacking soul and intregity. People are being made to be as overly stimulated and addicted as possible, to trying to get attention and even giving it, spending money as often and as much as possible, all with wanton abandon or recklessness.
Wanting to prove their existence matters, doesn't that hit the nail on the head so succintly too? That explains so much, they want to stand out, to feel important and special, to not feel they regard importance, usefuleness, purpose and such, now I get it tbh. I can really relate to that extremely as well actually. It's so nihilistic though, so despair inducing.
People are destroying their integrities, embracing humiliation, putting themselves in danger and harming themselves for the sake of "clout".
Thats exactly it, that's so profoundly true. They'e being "programmed" to believe entertainment, television, the internet, social media, Hollywood are all the absolute necessary virtues in life, the new religion and Gods maybe. But there is nothing "holy" about these either, definitely "unholier" than religion at least ofc. It reminds me of those who actually abuse religion to manipulate others, to turn it into a cult and imprison and abuse others, using religion and the fear of God as an excuse.
Technology and maybe science really feel like the story of Prometheus and introducing fire to the mortals. I never understood why God viciously, brutally punished Prometheus for literal eternity in such a painful, hellish, endless daily loop and I absolutely do not condone nor accept what he did to Prometheus, but I think I slightly understand why he did it, but only slightly. ~
Once again my Fujitora avatar is feeling apt right now, he permanently blinded himself due to seeing horrors in the world so extremely awful, such great evil that he couldn't bear to see anything again. Also I'm sure it's a play on "justice being blind" and people being willingfully or at least unintentionally blind to what's really going on around them and in the world ofc.
Huge blog post incoming, warning!:
I used to really love this girl deeply many years ago, I'll never forget how she turned from a complete social reject/shut-in/wall-flower/hermit pretty much etc and would completely shut everyone out, not trust anyone and isolated herself entirely, I met her through a friend by chance and we hit it off immediately, bonded like magnets (or Fire Meeting Gasoline as Sia would say). Anyway, we became BFFs and I fell in love with her and I'm almost 100% certain she felt the same way back, some other people swore it too and her body language gave it away as well.
The point of me mentioning this anyway is that, eventually she cut me off, she ghosted me hard one day of the blue, made sure I couldn't contact her or meet her ever again, acted like she had vanished completely and even made me think something fatal had happened to her. Years later, I happened to search for her on Facebook on a whim and what I saw completely horrified me. She had posted pictures of herself bare naked all over her Faceboook. Certain parts were "censored artistically" but it was explicit enough especially to horrify me. She had gone from this completely pure, sweet, innocent angel who was really shy and reserved with her body to flaunting her body and flirting with random men online on her Facebook, dirty comments and such.
I never felt such pain until that day. The last time I felt that kind of pain when I realised she had ghosted me and was avoiding me and I had gone several months without even a scrap of communication/contact from her and thus it became many years too.
There's much worse things that go in the world of course, that happens to millions of others even and I have survived much worse too before her and after that, including in the last few years BUT as I kept lamenting to my own deep frustrations, I let a single person, a sweet, innocent, seemingly harmless girl who I loved and adored break me completely, when such horrific traumas in my past, extreme abuse including sexual but especially emotional and mental, years of rampant racism and bullying, complete social isolation and rejection and so on never broke me as a person, but this random person, this girl I met by chance completely destroyed me and I've never truly recovered from it either.
I learned in hindsight it was ultimately my own fault, I caused my own suffering with her, it was all in the ego and obsession BUT for YEARS I blamed her somewhat, even though I always felt and knew that it was probably my fault she ghosted me almost permanently. I've actually struggled with narcissism for most of my life, brought on by trauma especially, it's a frequent symptom/consequence of trauma apparently as you desperately try to compensate for your own ruined self esteem and the intense emotional pain you suffer, especially if it happens in childhood as it did to me too.
Every single day, I keep wishing I hadn't fucked things up with her so much, that I could go back and change things with her, treat her better, give her room to breathe, give her space and not overwhelm her so much, especially when she desperately needed me so much herself, when I was meant to be her anchor/rock/pillar etc. I didn't know at the time but her stepfather was apparently physically and potentially sexually abusing her too, as he was a majorly depressed, abusive alcoholic and would go into psychotic fits of rage when drunk enough. He was traumatised after being robbed on his bicycle and having his ribs broken which really changed him too. S
he also was dealing with a severe eating disorder and one time I googled her name years later after meeting her, a newspaper article came up with her being featured, talking about how she had an eating disorder around the same time she knew me and was eating hamster food. There was a photo of her with bandages wrapped around her chest and waist like an Egyptian mummy or Zoro recently and she practically looked like a skeleton, like the children you see starving in Africa, no joke. Seeing her like that, hearing her story and knowing she was going through all that whilst I was close friends with her, whereas I was complelely and blissifully unaware/oblivious/ignorant etc just broke me entirely, I collapsed and cried for literal hours. I felt so guilty, so responsible somehow and it took me a long time to recover from that too. Seeing her like that haunted me for a very long time, still does on occassion too.
Anyway, that's enough of my huge blog/life story/essay/rant/rambling lol. I just felt the need to get that off my chest. I really changed as a person after her, she transformed, became like a butterfly, blossomed, bloomed, whatever but I became the complete opposite, I became what she was like before, I became the shut-in, depressed, anti-social, angry, bitter etc hermit. Isn't life poetically ironic like that?
With that story I gave, as self indulgent as it was and also to do this too, I really feel this song hits home for what happened with me and that girl:
Sia's songs really hit home and so hard, as well as some other songs out there ofc. When certain songs and artists know exactly what you're feeling and experiencing, to have that insane relatability and empathy, to speak to you when nothing and nobody else can, it really is crazy!
Completely agree, very well said! Couldn't have said it better myself! People are becoming so spritiually, mentally, emotionally devoid, lacking soul and intregity. People are being made to be as overly stimulated and addicted as possible, to trying to get attention and even giving it, spending money as often and as much as possible, all with wanton abandon or recklessness.
Wanting to prove their existence matters, doesn't that hit the nail on the head so succintly too? That explains so much, they want to stand out, to feel important and special, to not feel they regard importance, usefuleness, purpose and such, now I get it tbh. I can really relate to that extremely as well actually. It's so nihilistic though, so despair inducing.
People are destroying their integrities, embracing humiliation, putting themselves in danger and harming themselves for the sake of "clout".
Thats exactly it, that's so profoundly true. They'e being "programmed" to believe entertainment, television, the internet, social media, Hollywood are all the absolute necessary virtues in life, the new religion and Gods maybe. But there is nothing "holy" about these either, definitely "unholier" than religion at least ofc. It reminds me of those who actually abuse religion to manipulate others, to turn it into a cult and imprison and abuse others, using religion and the fear of God as an excuse.
Technology and maybe science really feel like the story of Prometheus and introducing fire to the mortals. I never understood why God viciously, brutally punished Prometheus for literal eternity in such a painful, hellish, endless daily loop and I absolutely do not condone nor accept what he did to Prometheus, but I think I slightly understand why he did it, but only slightly. ~
Once again my Fujitora avatar is feeling apt right now, he permanently blinded himself due to seeing horrors in the world so extremely awful, such great evil that he couldn't bear to see anything again. Also I'm sure it's a play on "justice being blind" and people being willingfully or at least unintentionally blind to what's really going on around them and in the world ofc.
Huge blog post incoming, warning!:
I used to really love this girl deeply many years ago, I'll never forget how she turned from a complete social reject/shut-in/wall-flower/hermit pretty much etc and would completely shut everyone out, not trust anyone and isolated herself entirely, I met her through a friend by chance and we hit it off immediately, bonded like magnets (or Fire Meeting Gasoline as Sia would say). Anyway, we became BFFs and I fell in love with her and I'm almost 100% certain she felt the same way back, some other people swore it too and her body language gave it away as well.
The point of me mentioning this anyway is that, eventually she cut me off, she ghosted me hard one day of the blue, made sure I couldn't contact her or meet her ever again, acted like she had vanished completely and even made me think something fatal had happened to her. Years later, I happened to search for her on Facebook on a whim and what I saw completely horrified me. She had posted pictures of herself bare naked all over her Faceboook. Certain parts were "censored artistically" but it was explicit enough especially to horrify me. She had gone from this completely pure, sweet, innocent angel who was really shy and reserved with her body to flaunting her body and flirting with random men online on her Facebook, dirty comments and such.
I never felt such pain until that day. The last time I felt that kind of pain when I realised she had ghosted me and was avoiding me and I had gone several months without even a scrap of communication/contact from her and thus it became many years too.
There's much worse things that go in the world of course, that happens to millions of others even and I have survived much worse too before her and after that, including in the last few years BUT as I kept lamenting to my own deep frustrations, I let a single person, a sweet, innocent, seemingly harmless girl who I loved and adored break me completely, when such horrific traumas in my past, extreme abuse including sexual but especially emotional and mental, years of rampant racism and bullying, complete social isolation and rejection and so on never broke me as a person, but this random person, this girl I met by chance completely destroyed me and I've never truly recovered from it either.
I learned in hindsight it was ultimately my own fault, I caused my own suffering with her, it was all in the ego and obsession BUT for YEARS I blamed her somewhat, even though I always felt and knew that it was probably my fault she ghosted me almost permanently. I've actually struggled with narcissism for most of my life, brought on by trauma especially, it's a frequent symptom/consequence of trauma apparently as you desperately try to compensate for your own ruined self esteem and the intense emotional pain you suffer, especially if it happens in childhood as it did to me too.
Every single day, I keep wishing I hadn't fucked things up with her so much, that I could go back and change things with her, treat her better, give her room to breathe, give her space and not overwhelm her so much, especially when she desperately needed me so much herself, when I was meant to be her anchor/rock/pillar etc. I didn't know at the time but her stepfather was apparently physically and potentially sexually abusing her too, as he was a majorly depressed, abusive alcoholic and would go into psychotic fits of rage when drunk enough. He was traumatised after being robbed on his bicycle and having his ribs broken which really changed him too. S
he also was dealing with a severe eating disorder and one time I googled her name years later after meeting her, a newspaper article came up with her being featured, talking about how she had an eating disorder around the same time she knew me and was eating hamster food. There was a photo of her with bandages wrapped around her chest and waist like an Egyptian mummy or Zoro recently and she practically looked like a skeleton, like the children you see starving in Africa, no joke. Seeing her like that, hearing her story and knowing she was going through all that whilst I was close friends with her, whereas I was complelely and blissifully unaware/oblivious/ignorant etc just broke me entirely, I collapsed and cried for literal hours. I felt so guilty, so responsible somehow and it took me a long time to recover from that too. Seeing her like that haunted me for a very long time, still does on occassion too.
Anyway, that's enough of my huge blog/life story/essay/rant/rambling lol. I just felt the need to get that off my chest. I really changed as a person after her, she transformed, became like a butterfly, blossomed, bloomed, whatever but I became the complete opposite, I became what she was like before, I became the shut-in, depressed, anti-social, angry, bitter etc hermit. Isn't life poetically ironic like that?
With that story I gave, as self indulgent as it was and also to do this too, I really feel this song hits home for what happened with me and that girl:
Sia's songs really hit home and so hard, as well as some other songs out there ofc. When certain songs and artists know exactly what you're feeling and experiencing, to have that insane relatability and empathy, to speak to you when nothing and nobody else can, it really is crazy!
Sanji wears raid suit again (fist hint). We move to Zoro vs King. Turns out King is an alien from outer space (third hint). Zoro cuts one hand/wing of King (second hint). King kills Zoro (0 hint).
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