Lmaooo Kainos! That is way too fitting, I did liken Kaido to Thanos before but it really does suit him! Even his treatment of Yamato vs how Thanos treats Nebula too. I guess Ulti is his Gamora but a Gamora who actually is loyal to him?
I had this random idea for a crack fiction where a drunken Kaido insists on getting a pet koi fish and sets his Calamaties outto get one lol. Here it is anyway, hope you guys like it!:
Title: "Koido Quest"
Scene 1: Kaido's Castle
Kaido: (leaning on his club) I want a pet, something majestic. Get me a giant Dragon Koi fish from Wano's waterfalls.
Scene 2: King, Queen, and Jack's Reaction
King: (exasperated) Seriously? Can't we just conquer more islands or something?
Queen: (burly, eccentric scientist, pointing at King) Conquer? Please! You lack imagination, my dear flying doofus.
Jack: (muttering) Why do I always get stuck with these lunatics?
Scene 3: The Quest Briefing
King: I'll fly there and grab the fish.
Queen: (sarcastically) Oh, what a revolutionary idea, King! Truly groundbreaking.
Jack: I'll... um, make sure the sea kings don't eat it?
Scene 4: King in the Sky
King: (sarcastically talking to himself) Oh, look at me, I'm King, flying around and doing all the work.
Queen: (interjecting) Oh, the epitome of creativity, soaring in the sky like a common bird.
King: You know what, Queen? Your experiments are the reason why we're stuck on this absurd quest.
Scene 5: Queen's Genetic Lab
Queen: (maniacal laughter) I'll make this fish a masterpiece! The Mozart of fish genetics!
King: Mozart? More like a fish with an identity crisis.
Jack: (trying to stay out of the argument) Can we focus on the fish, please?
Scene 6: Jack's Underwater Adventure
Jack: (struggling with sea kings) This better be worth it. I swear.
Sea King: (roars)
Jack: (yelling) Can't you guys just chill for once?
Scene 7: Reunion at Kaido's Castle
King: (drops the fish) Here's your majestic Koi.
Queen: (inspects the fish) You call that majestic? Please, allow me to improve it!
Jack: (sarcastically) Oh, I'm sure that'll help.
Kaido: Just give me the fish. I don't have time for your bickering.
Scene 8: Kaido's Introduction
Kaido: (enthusiastically) Meet Koido, my new pet! Worororo!
Koido: (awkwardly flops around, attempting to laugh)
Scene 9: Kaido and Koido's Bonding Time
Kaido: (laughs heartily) Worororo!
Koido: (struggles to mimic Kaido's laugh) Woro...roro...uh?
Scene 10: King, Queen, and Jack's Aftermath
King: Can we go back to conquering islands now?
Queen: Conquering is for the unimaginative. Science is the real power.
Jack: I just want to avoid more sea kings.
Kaido: I'm happy with Koido. You three did well.
Scene 11: Queen's Genetic Lab - Bonus Scene
Queen: (mumbling) Let's add some more flair to Koido's laugh, shall we?
Scene 12: Kaido and Koido's Laughter Echoing
Kaido: (laughing with Koido) Worororo!
Koido: (now with a touch of Queen's flair) Woro...roro...uh-huh?
End: The echoes of laughter resonate throughout the castle as Koido attempts to master his new, eccentric laugh. The trio, begrudgingly satisfied, contemplates the next unpredictable adventure.
Scene 13: Kaido's Praise
Kaido: (smirking) Koido has quite the unique laugh, doesn't he?
Queen: Well, of course! I added a touch of genius to it. A masterpiece, I tell you!
King: Genius? More like insanity.
Jack: Can we get back to conquering now?
Scene 14: Koido's Accommodations
Kaido: Find a suitable place for Koido. I want him to enjoy the luxurious life.
King: Oh, so now we're pampering fish? What's next, a fishy spa day?
Queen: A spa day for Koido? Brilliant idea!
Jack: I can't believe I'm witnessing this.
Scene 15: The Pampered Koido
Koido: (awkwardly flopping around in a miniature fishbowl with a crown on his head)
Queen: Pure elegance!
King: I can't believe we're entertaining this madness.
Jack: At least it's not another sea king encounter.
Scene 16: A New Assignment
Kaido: Now, I need you three to organize a Fish Fashion Show for Koido.
King: A what now?
Queen: Oh, a fashion show for Koido! What a splendid idea!
Jack: Seriously? Fish fashion?
Scene 17: The Absurd Fish Fashion Show
King: (rolling his eyes) This is absurd.
Queen: Koido loves it! Look at him appreciating fashion.
Jack: I never thought I'd see the day when we'd organize a fish fashion show.
Scene 18: A Sudden Interruption
Marine Messenger: (bursting in) Attention, Kaido! The Marines are approaching!
Kaido: (grinning) Excellent. Let them come. Koido and I are ready.
Queen: (excitedly) Can we dress Koido for battle too?
King: Please, no more.
Jack: I've seen it all.
Scene 19: The Battle Commences
Kaido: (laughing with Koido) Worororo!
Koido: (flapping his fins, attempting to join in) Woro...roro...uh?
Scene 20: Post-Battle Celebrations
King: Can we go back to conquering now?
Queen: Conquering is overrated. Let's focus on more important matters, like upgrading Koido's laugh.
Jack: I just want to go back to not dealing with fish.
Kaido: (smirking) Koido, my loyal companion. We shall conquer the seas together.
End: The unlikely trio, now used to the eccentricities of Kaido and his pet, embarks on yet another unpredictable adventure.