Controversial Is dating really as hard as some people say it is?
- Thread starter Monkey D Theories
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- Tags i will never t(h)rust a woman plap plap
That's such a problematic way to see the world.
Of course it's wrong
DO NOT force yourself to date if you don't want to. You might hurt yourself and hurt your partner in consequence. Being alone is not some kind of shame. The important thing is to stay connected with people. But do not seek a relationship just for the relationshit.
We can live alone and be very happy.
Of course it's wrong
DO NOT force yourself to date if you don't want to. You might hurt yourself and hurt your partner in consequence. Being alone is not some kind of shame. The important thing is to stay connected with people. But do not seek a relationship just for the relationshit.
We can live alone and be very happy.
I've been living alone for 12 years, loneliness in term of relationships has NEVER even been close to a problem.
The problem is not loneliness, the problem is the vision people put on celibacy. This vision is something pushed by our heteronormative society and people who don't understand how to REALLY think about what they want instead of what society wants them to have.
Being alone (I might in term of relationship) is NEVER a problem. The only thing you must do is be sure to connect with other people and try to at least have one or a few friends if you can.
The problem is not loneliness, the problem is the vision people put on celibacy. This vision is something pushed by our heteronormative society and people who don't understand how to REALLY think about what they want instead of what society wants them to have.
Being alone (I might in term of relationship) is NEVER a problem. The only thing you must do is be sure to connect with other people and try to at least have one or a few friends if you can.
Only if you're poor, ugly or an incel. If you're a combo of these 3 things than its sad
If you're only ugly, you can compensate by going to the gym and being someone interesting in many other ways, or having a nice amount of money, just fax (these things are going to attract different kinds of women, obviously). Actually its just a matter of making things easier or harder and/or giving you more options to choose overall, and also, you can't ask for a extremely pretty girl or rich girl when you are not on the same level in appearance or networth. Im not saying you can't have one, its possible, but by the standards of our current society, you either need to be super handsome or have money, perhaps both, lmao just look at famous football stars. As i said before, its all a matter of making things easier or harder (if not almost impossible and self humilliating to your self esteem during the process), because technically any guy can get any girl he wants, but how far will you he to go? How long will it last? At what costs? Those are the real questions that need to be made
If you're only ugly, you can compensate by going to the gym and being someone interesting in many other ways, or having a nice amount of money, just fax (these things are going to attract different kinds of women, obviously). Actually its just a matter of making things easier or harder and/or giving you more options to choose overall, and also, you can't ask for a extremely pretty girl or rich girl when you are not on the same level in appearance or networth. Im not saying you can't have one, its possible, but by the standards of our current society, you either need to be super handsome or have money, perhaps both, lmao just look at famous football stars. As i said before, its all a matter of making things easier or harder (if not almost impossible and self humilliating to your self esteem during the process), because technically any guy can get any girl he wants, but how far will you he to go? How long will it last? At what costs? Those are the real questions that need to be made
Those *friends* that are close to you eventually will break away due to them being husband and kids also works
And they hang out less and less
You'll be less of their priorities
Hence you still end up alone.
So Stop the world salad
Much of the loneliness come from lack of romance and compatible lovers
You are unable to grasp the distinction between platonic relationship and Romantic relationship.
Romantic relationship fills a different void inside you. Something that Platonic relationship just can't. No matter how much you try self gaslight.
Arguing they are is foolish and misguided
And they hang out less and less
You'll be less of their priorities
Hence you still end up alone.
So Stop the world salad
Much of the loneliness come from lack of romance and compatible lovers
You are unable to grasp the distinction between platonic relationship and Romantic relationship.
Romantic relationship fills a different void inside you. Something that Platonic relationship just can't. No matter how much you try self gaslight.
Arguing they are is foolish and misguided
Friendship is a something to cultivate, you can't just ask for an easy job. If you want the relationship to strive, you have to put in some work.
No Word salad. If you have a problem with celibacy, it's because of a heteronormative conditionning, not because celibacy is hurtfull to you. And I know quite a few about the subject so you won't have the final word here.
There is Loneliness and celibacy. Loneliness is what I have been experiencing for 12 years and still going. It's the absence of relationships of any kind. (except family of course)
Celibacy is the absence of a partner. Celibacy contrary to loneliness, is not hurtfull in ANY way. So stop the BS and the problematic talk that lead people to question their life.
Being celibat is OKAY. It's not shamefull and it's not hurtfull. In fact it allows you to be more aware of what you are and what you want.
Do not try to argue about the hardship of celibacy in front of someone who has been exactly that without problem for more than a decade.
No Word salad. If you have a problem with celibacy, it's because of a heteronormative conditionning, not because celibacy is hurtfull to you. And I know quite a few about the subject so you won't have the final word here.
There is Loneliness and celibacy. Loneliness is what I have been experiencing for 12 years and still going. It's the absence of relationships of any kind. (except family of course)
Celibacy is the absence of a partner. Celibacy contrary to loneliness, is not hurtfull in ANY way. So stop the BS and the problematic talk that lead people to question their life.
Being celibat is OKAY. It's not shamefull and it's not hurtfull. In fact it allows you to be more aware of what you are and what you want.
Do not try to argue about the hardship of celibacy in front of someone who has been exactly that without problem for more than a decade.
There's no point in trying hard to maintaining friendship if the energy doesn't reciprocate
Heteronormative is word salad.
Most people and animals are straight and yearn for relationships
Celibacy is part of loneliness
And you think you can be good example of someone that living your life in celibacy and loneliness ?
Society disagree.
Hence *virgin* *never touch a woman* is popular insults
Because people thinks there's something fundamentally wrong with you if they find out you are lonely.
There's difference between Voluntary Celibate and Involuntary Celibate
Involuntary Celibate means you don't want to be celibate. It's a condition that's imposed on you . It's something you don't sign up for. It's outside of your control .
You want to get out of this condition that was imposed on you for reasons outside your control.
That's what InCel means.
The former is a different struggle compared to later
Heteronormative is word salad.
Most people and animals are straight and yearn for relationships
Celibacy is part of loneliness
And you think you can be good example of someone that living your life in celibacy and loneliness ?
Society disagree.
Hence *virgin* *never touch a woman* is popular insults
Because people thinks there's something fundamentally wrong with you if they find out you are lonely.
There's difference between Voluntary Celibate and Involuntary Celibate
Involuntary Celibate means you don't want to be celibate. It's a condition that's imposed on you . It's something you don't sign up for. It's outside of your control .
You want to get out of this condition that was imposed on you for reasons outside your control.
That's what InCel means.
The former is a different struggle compared to later
Friendship is not a due. It's an exchange. You cannot hope to keep a friend if you make 0 effort in the relationship.
No. It's just a word you don't understand.
The appeal to nature is not an argument. I don't see you climb trees naked.
In the eyes of society yes. Hence why people view celibacy has a problem when in reality, it's not one.
I'm not unhappy because I'm lonely or celibat, I'm unhappy because of my mental condition. While I would benefit from having more friends, I have absolutely ZERO problem being celibate.
Celibacy is not a curse and it's NOT destructive.
Yes, that's what I'm saying. You are influenced by society instead of being influenced by what you really want and really need.
In incel circles yes. If you see that, get new friends.
Indeed. That's a problem with heteronormativity and the current patriarcal vision of celibacy. People who are alone are seen as unhappy, when most of the time, it's their OWN choice.
Take out the carcan of the pressure of society and you will be happier. And if your friends laugh at you for that, find new ones.
None of those are destructive.
Nothing is imposed in celibacy. Relationships are not a due.
Of course it is. Even autistic people who struggle big time with relationships can manage to find people and partners.
There is no reason for you not to find someone if you respect the other person and you are honest with your feelings. But of course, the second part of this sentence is absolutely necessary.
The problem with incel is the respect for women. Exactly what I just explained before. If you you respect women or men (I don't know wish ones you prefer) there should be no problem. Incel are alone because they can help themselves but be disrespectfull and dishonnest about what they REALLY feel.
Again. I'm been alone in the STRICTER sence both in term of friendly and loving relationships for more than a decade and it NEVER turned me into a woman hater.
So.. if you have problems with celibacy and want a partner, you know where to start.
No. It's just a word you don't understand.
The appeal to nature is not an argument. I don't see you climb trees naked.
In the eyes of society yes. Hence why people view celibacy has a problem when in reality, it's not one.
I'm not unhappy because I'm lonely or celibat, I'm unhappy because of my mental condition. While I would benefit from having more friends, I have absolutely ZERO problem being celibate.
Celibacy is not a curse and it's NOT destructive.
Yes, that's what I'm saying. You are influenced by society instead of being influenced by what you really want and really need.
In incel circles yes. If you see that, get new friends.
Indeed. That's a problem with heteronormativity and the current patriarcal vision of celibacy. People who are alone are seen as unhappy, when most of the time, it's their OWN choice.
Take out the carcan of the pressure of society and you will be happier. And if your friends laugh at you for that, find new ones.
None of those are destructive.
Nothing is imposed in celibacy. Relationships are not a due.
Of course it is. Even autistic people who struggle big time with relationships can manage to find people and partners.
There is no reason for you not to find someone if you respect the other person and you are honest with your feelings. But of course, the second part of this sentence is absolutely necessary.
The problem with incel is the respect for women. Exactly what I just explained before. If you you respect women or men (I don't know wish ones you prefer) there should be no problem. Incel are alone because they can help themselves but be disrespectfull and dishonnest about what they REALLY feel.
Again. I'm been alone in the STRICTER sence both in term of friendly and loving relationships for more than a decade and it NEVER turned me into a woman hater.
So.. if you have problems with celibacy and want a partner, you know where to start.
Naw imagine you..
A grown ass man competing for company and attention of another grown ass man WITH his wife and Kids
That's pretty invasive eh?
You want to see me climbing trees naked?
What about appeal to humanity example I just give?
It is if it's Involuntary
Thing is Everyone wanted to be loved and valued exclusively
Why would Incels use insults that describe them and their struggle?
Do you know what popular insults mean?
It means EVERYONE uses.
What is Women favorite Insult?
Incel, Body shaming.
Women made the word Incel a slur because they see lack of sexual success as inherent failure of a men
We are talking about people who are alone that ISN'T their own choice.
We are talking about the broader loneliness crisis that causes high suicide rates
One is
It's imposed when it's happening to you by not YOUR own choice
The problem with Incels is their looks.
Their attitudes and opinions is a reaction from their life experiences
Being respectful is not the same thing as being sexually compatible
Women beaters always have Women to beat up. Incel don't.
Most attractive men have the most misogynistic believes about women.
Because you are an ideologue
Your ideology blinded you to your reality
You can criticize someone without being a hater
Yeah When you are starting?
A grown ass man competing for company and attention of another grown ass man WITH his wife and Kids
That's pretty invasive eh?
You want to see me climbing trees naked?
What about appeal to humanity example I just give?
It is if it's Involuntary
Thing is Everyone wanted to be loved and valued exclusively
Why would Incels use insults that describe them and their struggle?
Do you know what popular insults mean?
It means EVERYONE uses.
What is Women favorite Insult?
Incel, Body shaming.
Women made the word Incel a slur because they see lack of sexual success as inherent failure of a men
We are talking about people who are alone that ISN'T their own choice.
We are talking about the broader loneliness crisis that causes high suicide rates
One is
It's imposed when it's happening to you by not YOUR own choice
The problem with Incels is their looks.
Their attitudes and opinions is a reaction from their life experiences
Being respectful is not the same thing as being sexually compatible
Women beaters always have Women to beat up. Incel don't.
Most attractive men have the most misogynistic believes about women.
Because you are an ideologue
Your ideology blinded you to your reality
You can criticize someone without being a hater
Yeah When you are starting?
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The F ?
Is this how you see a friendship ? A Competition ? Yeah.. Things are starting to make sence.
Bad example. No need to answer it.
When you dig, you will most of the time find out that this "involuntary" celibacy is due to the behavior of the person. So it's "involuntary" simply because the guy doesn't want to change and is therefore repealing everyone.
I know a lot of weird and socially awkard people who found out a partner just fine. When you respect people and put the effort to actually search where people want to date (and not necessarily where you think), there is no reason for struggle.
And again. Celibacy is NEVER destructive. The destruction is due to the vision you will put on the celibacy. Nothing more.
You can do that while not being a slave of heteronormativity and the eyes of society.
It's not exclusive.
That's the right question. Because deep down, Incels hate themselves. But since they can't process their emotions correctly, they use a scapegoat and lash on to women.
I'm sorry, this type of behavior do not happens neither with my family, the few people I frequent or even anyone I follow.
Those insults and invectives are done by toxic people. And yes, there are a lot of toxic person on the planet. If someone do that to you. Find new friends, or you will suffer.
No. They made that as an insult because incels are hamrfull to women Einstein. (Careful, with that rethoric, I'm starting to lose patience with you, don't you even dare defend those guys and their rethoric)
And If you meet women that say that you are not manly enough, again, find new friends.
Being alone wasn't my choice to begin with either. I MADE IT my choice later. When you can't, it's OK. It's not failure and it's not a curse. You are not less of a man because you are alone or because you choose to be alone. And you should stop ANYONE who tries to tell you the opposite.
Again. Celibacy is NOT destructive. It can only hurt you if you listen to what society tells you about it.
If you want to be a slave to society, be my guest, but don't bring other people with you.
What causes high suicide death, is - AGAIN - the VALUE society puts on celibacy. NOT celibacy itself.
Loneliness (as in not having friend) is another issue.
No.
Again, wrong. There is no imposition, because you are not stripped of anything.
Relationships are NOT something that society or women owes to you!
Being alone, being by choice or not is only destructive - again - if you listen to the judgment of others or the value of society on celibacy.
Celibacy is actually quite a good thing in most cases.
WRONG. It's their behavior.
And you not understanding that is the reason why you seems to struggle with relationships.
You may not be aware of that. But everyone telling you that the most important thing to create a relationship is the physical characteristics are...
LYING TO YOU
In reality, it has been studied with the Mater Evaluation theory, a psychological study, that the physical characteristics only plays on average 2% of the importance in a relationship and only 30 % in the first instant of the creation of a couple.
In other words, in reality, a lot of ugly people are in relationship and the reason is not wealth but a whole lot of things.
The physical is part what researchers are calling the "common lens". It's 30% of the initial attraction and only 2% in The others % are:
- "Perceiver Lens" : If the person you are dating is open or not to relationship, your attractivity will change in function.
- "The feature Lens" : This will be the tastes of the person that you are dating. Ex: You happens to like One Piece and the other will like One Piece too so they will like you. Or in invert, you like Jazz and they hate that, so they will see you as less attractive.
- "Target Specific Lens" : The unique pass taken by the relationship.
In other words, the attraction is due to HOW the person will perceive YOU in function of their OWN values and taste. So as long as you are respectfull and search correctly, there is no reasons not to find someone for you. EVEN if you are ugly.
No.
Being respectfull is the basis. You cannot be an incel and be respectfull with women. Because it means you would see relationships as something that is due to you and that's not how reality works.
I'm actually the opposite.
You are the ideologue one. You are basing your argumentation on nothing but baseless rumors are biases about women, men and incels.
Be respectfull with women. And do not think that the universe owes you a relationship.
Is this how you see a friendship ? A Competition ? Yeah.. Things are starting to make sence.
Bad example. No need to answer it.
When you dig, you will most of the time find out that this "involuntary" celibacy is due to the behavior of the person. So it's "involuntary" simply because the guy doesn't want to change and is therefore repealing everyone.
I know a lot of weird and socially awkard people who found out a partner just fine. When you respect people and put the effort to actually search where people want to date (and not necessarily where you think), there is no reason for struggle.
And again. Celibacy is NEVER destructive. The destruction is due to the vision you will put on the celibacy. Nothing more.
You can do that while not being a slave of heteronormativity and the eyes of society.
It's not exclusive.
That's the right question. Because deep down, Incels hate themselves. But since they can't process their emotions correctly, they use a scapegoat and lash on to women.
I'm sorry, this type of behavior do not happens neither with my family, the few people I frequent or even anyone I follow.
Those insults and invectives are done by toxic people. And yes, there are a lot of toxic person on the planet. If someone do that to you. Find new friends, or you will suffer.
No. They made that as an insult because incels are hamrfull to women Einstein. (Careful, with that rethoric, I'm starting to lose patience with you, don't you even dare defend those guys and their rethoric)
And If you meet women that say that you are not manly enough, again, find new friends.
Being alone wasn't my choice to begin with either. I MADE IT my choice later. When you can't, it's OK. It's not failure and it's not a curse. You are not less of a man because you are alone or because you choose to be alone. And you should stop ANYONE who tries to tell you the opposite.
Again. Celibacy is NOT destructive. It can only hurt you if you listen to what society tells you about it.
If you want to be a slave to society, be my guest, but don't bring other people with you.
What causes high suicide death, is - AGAIN - the VALUE society puts on celibacy. NOT celibacy itself.
Loneliness (as in not having friend) is another issue.
No.
Again, wrong. There is no imposition, because you are not stripped of anything.
Relationships are NOT something that society or women owes to you!
Being alone, being by choice or not is only destructive - again - if you listen to the judgment of others or the value of society on celibacy.
Celibacy is actually quite a good thing in most cases.
WRONG. It's their behavior.
And you not understanding that is the reason why you seems to struggle with relationships.
You may not be aware of that. But everyone telling you that the most important thing to create a relationship is the physical characteristics are...
LYING TO YOU
In reality, it has been studied with the Mater Evaluation theory, a psychological study, that the physical characteristics only plays on average 2% of the importance in a relationship and only 30 % in the first instant of the creation of a couple.
In other words, in reality, a lot of ugly people are in relationship and the reason is not wealth but a whole lot of things.
The physical is part what researchers are calling the "common lens". It's 30% of the initial attraction and only 2% in The others % are:
- "Perceiver Lens" : If the person you are dating is open or not to relationship, your attractivity will change in function.
- "The feature Lens" : This will be the tastes of the person that you are dating. Ex: You happens to like One Piece and the other will like One Piece too so they will like you. Or in invert, you like Jazz and they hate that, so they will see you as less attractive.
- "Target Specific Lens" : The unique pass taken by the relationship.
In other words, the attraction is due to HOW the person will perceive YOU in function of their OWN values and taste. So as long as you are respectfull and search correctly, there is no reasons not to find someone for you. EVEN if you are ugly.
No.
Being respectfull is the basis. You cannot be an incel and be respectfull with women. Because it means you would see relationships as something that is due to you and that's not how reality works.
I'm actually the opposite.
You are the ideologue one. You are basing your argumentation on nothing but baseless rumors are biases about women, men and incels.
Be respectfull with women. And do not think that the universe owes you a relationship.
It's either a suicide, or a possible school shooting, if you're in America.
But the minds of vast majority of lads on Earth usually don't reach that point of no return
So they learn from the others who have succeeded, hoping that the results will show
Actions and results matter more than just words you see
But the minds of vast majority of lads on Earth usually don't reach that point of no return
So they learn from the others who have succeeded, hoping that the results will show
Actions and results matter more than just words you see
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The Universe owe us a relationship.
It created soul mates with us.
Ancient Greeks testified human was born with four legs and hands with two mouths and eyes.
But they keep fighting and unable to reconcile with themselves
So Zeus slashed humans to split into two which become the male and the female
That's what Significant Other precisely means
A man is separated from this significant other and yearning to reunited again.
What made them hate themselves?
Who can make them un-hate themselves?
You know the answer
Nonsense
Yes
Lmao????!!
If your true Socialist and Communist,
You need to advocate for Government mandated Jobs, income, house,foods AND relationships
As that is the fundamental goal.
To make humans live a fullfiling life
It created soul mates with us.
Ancient Greeks testified human was born with four legs and hands with two mouths and eyes.
But they keep fighting and unable to reconcile with themselves
So Zeus slashed humans to split into two which become the male and the female
That's what Significant Other precisely means
A man is separated from this significant other and yearning to reunited again.
What made them hate themselves?
Who can make them un-hate themselves?
You know the answer
Nonsense
Yes
Lmao????!!
If your true Socialist and Communist,
You need to advocate for Government mandated Jobs, income, house,foods AND relationships
As that is the fundamental goal.
To make humans live a fullfiling life