Are you happy?
- Thread starter Toby D. Dog
- Start date
@gz89
I don't know if I can really offer valid advice on this, because I've never been in a relationship.
But I feel like @Okamakama has a point.
Like I don't think cheating "just happens". It requires at least some reciprocation on your part in order to form such a relationship. So I think it might be worth it to consider why you made that decision.
I don't know what your relationship goals are, but if you want to get married and start a family in the long run, infidelity at this point is probably a sign that this relationship isn't going to last. Especially because what you did was a massive break of her trust, and even if she forgives you and doesn't want to end the relationship, this could create some long lasting resentment that could manifest in other forms down the road.
I don't know if I can really offer valid advice on this, because I've never been in a relationship.
But I feel like @Okamakama has a point.
Like I don't think cheating "just happens". It requires at least some reciprocation on your part in order to form such a relationship. So I think it might be worth it to consider why you made that decision.
I don't know what your relationship goals are, but if you want to get married and start a family in the long run, infidelity at this point is probably a sign that this relationship isn't going to last. Especially because what you did was a massive break of her trust, and even if she forgives you and doesn't want to end the relationship, this could create some long lasting resentment that could manifest in other forms down the road.
If you imagine yourself in 5 years from now, who's by your side? Your gf or the other girl? Looks like you're not interested in messin around and playin games, you think cheatin was a mistake and you wanna build smth serious, so whom you imagine your future w/ is the most important question.
I get that the feeling of excitement and novelty played a part in this, but would this have outweighed your feelings for your gf if she's rly your soulmate? I know I can't imagine myself bein w/ anyone other than my bf, he's my soulmate. That doesn't mean I don't look at the other men I find attractive, and the opportunity for smth to happen w/ some of them did arise more than once. These opportunities will prob keep comin cause that's part of life and you have to deal w/ that. I just know nth will ever happen cause how I feel abt my bf's stronger than anything else.
What's holdin you back from ending things w/ your current gf? Is it your feelings for your gf or more "practical" reasons?
I get that the feeling of excitement and novelty played a part in this, but would this have outweighed your feelings for your gf if she's rly your soulmate? I know I can't imagine myself bein w/ anyone other than my bf, he's my soulmate. That doesn't mean I don't look at the other men I find attractive, and the opportunity for smth to happen w/ some of them did arise more than once. These opportunities will prob keep comin cause that's part of life and you have to deal w/ that. I just know nth will ever happen cause how I feel abt my bf's stronger than anything else.
What's holdin you back from ending things w/ your current gf? Is it your feelings for your gf or more "practical" reasons?
omg yeah u should consider her emotional state.
if she can get really hurt by it or possibly reach suicidal level then u should not tell her at all 😭😭
one of instances where a white lie is better than ugly truth 🥲
but from my experience with friends breaking up with petty or no reason can also hurt deeply 💀
u should figure it out, make sure it is something that benefit the your gf the most and make u suffer the most or you can to live with this deep guilt in your heart knowing you broke her trust 💀
if she can get really hurt by it or possibly reach suicidal level then u should not tell her at all 😭😭
one of instances where a white lie is better than ugly truth 🥲
but from my experience with friends breaking up with petty or no reason can also hurt deeply 💀
u should figure it out, make sure it is something that benefit the your gf the most and make u suffer the most or you can to live with this deep guilt in your heart knowing you broke her trust 💀
I feel like a relationship is something I’ve really wanted, but idk. I haven’t seriously been looking for a partner because I don’t think I’m ready yet.
I’m 23 at the moment, so I feel like I have time. Most people my age have been in some sort of relationship. A few are married or are in long term relationships.
For me, I feel like I don’t want to really try to date until I know I’m able to give my best possible self to someone. And I know I can’t do that now, so I feel content in waiting. I want to take care of my physical and mental health, finish converting to Judaism, go back to college and do my masters, and maybe get a better job.
I think at that point, getting a girlfriend would be something I’d really focus on.
I feel like a lot of people just tend to jump into relationships. Most of my friends’ relationships have eventually failed.
So I don’t see the point in jumping into something like that until I know I’m ready.
I’m 23 at the moment, so I feel like I have time. Most people my age have been in some sort of relationship. A few are married or are in long term relationships.
For me, I feel like I don’t want to really try to date until I know I’m able to give my best possible self to someone. And I know I can’t do that now, so I feel content in waiting. I want to take care of my physical and mental health, finish converting to Judaism, go back to college and do my masters, and maybe get a better job.
I think at that point, getting a girlfriend would be something I’d really focus on.
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I feel like a lot of people just tend to jump into relationships. Most of my friends’ relationships have eventually failed.
So I don’t see the point in jumping into something like that until I know I’m ready.
I recently realized that I’m probably peaking in life - my new job provides me more money and less stress than any other, I got married last week to my longtime partner, I’m healthier/in better shape than I’ve been since high school, my relationships with family and friends are more stable than ever before, and I am still the funniest/most charismatic poster on this shithole forum…so yeah, my jubilation meter is full to bursting :cheers:
Ill give you a word of an advice and a bit of hard love
If you are man enough to cheat, you should be man enough to admit it.
Cheating doesnt fall from the sky, you could have stopped during first flirting, first touch, first kiss, first this and that. There were so many breaks you could have pulled yet you didnt
Girl you are dating, if she loves you, if she cares for you... she deserves to know. While you can say it aint easy to say you cheated i can tell you from experience it is harder to hear you"ve been cheated on
So, be a man, own up to your mistake, apologize for it, accept whatever outcome you get and make a firm decision to never repeat it again
If you are man enough to cheat, you should be man enough to admit it.
Cheating doesnt fall from the sky, you could have stopped during first flirting, first touch, first kiss, first this and that. There were so many breaks you could have pulled yet you didnt
Girl you are dating, if she loves you, if she cares for you... she deserves to know. While you can say it aint easy to say you cheated i can tell you from experience it is harder to hear you"ve been cheated on
So, be a man, own up to your mistake, apologize for it, accept whatever outcome you get and make a firm decision to never repeat it again
Oh, didn't know. Congrats, @Hanners220! Rly happy for you!
