For the whole "does Oden actually owe the people of Wano", I think it's two-fold.
From the insular Wano feudal-Japan viewpoint- yes, he does. It's noblesse oblige and bushido. Oden is the lord of these people. He was born into privilege, and it is his responsibility, as their leader, to ensure his people's happiness and safety. It's kind of like how Vivi taught Luffy to be a better leader by begging for help- maybe not the best example but it's what come to me. Oden was responsible for them, and he left them. Twice. And that caused misery.
But then there's the other perspective. And that's the time honoured theme of One Piece- freedom and dreams. And Oden, for better or for worse, chased his dreams. Sure, he was born into the Wano system, but that system ain't perfect. Oden is a maverick who went against the grain, and that's ultimately going to lead to Wano opening it's borders.
So, folk need to remember- the characters are not perfect. They are not written to be, because that's boring and unrealistic. Your average Joe from Wano just wants his Shogun to take care of him. That's fair enough. They're pissed that Oden didn't do that (from their perspective) and just danced around when he came back. On the other hand, one-in-a-million Oden isn't average. He couldn't settle for staying in Wano his whole life. But he still feels guilty over leaving them, because there's the argument that he put himself above everyone else.
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If i was Oden why in the world would i trust the man ( and his pirate ally) who admits to my face that he screw the country over with lies, killing my own father in the process, and repeatedly attempting to go after the life of my Wife/Children. Why would i ever even come close to have some kind of verbal contract with that person ?
That just sounds so dumb to me, really.
People are going to die, yes, likely even innocent people, but instead of letting the enemy gear up for 5 years while i humiliate myself in the streets, having the people that admired me before lose faith in me.....
You said it yourself, Oden could've went to War 5 years later anyways, so War was still an option in Oden's mind, right?
Why then waste the initiative of rallying up Hyo and his forces to beat down an enemy that was far weaker at that time ?
I know that you're one of the most level headed users here, but this entire Oden/Orochi, Kaidou fiasco + Oden's decisions...i just don't get behind it.
Guilt over what happened to Orochi as a child, under Oden's families watch, I think has played a major part. And guilt in general that he left Wano.
Plus, for five years, it seems Orochi and Kaido kept their word. There was peace. No more killings, no more kidnappings. Because of how the chapters flow, with the five years been skipped over so rapidly, I think the effect there was kind of lost on the reader's. Cause from our perspective, in the very same chapter as Oden's first dance Orochi kills Hyo's wife. So that makes us think, "Christ Oden, it's obvious he couldn't be trusted to keep his side of the deal." But in series Orochi does, in fact seem good to his word, and that's no small amount of time.