Al Sama Trial Thread

[AL sama]

I'm summoned after eons of silence

milord this court has wasted my time over and over again without any reason whatsoever

I ask you to do just to me and my time

 

[Reborn]

go ahead

under section 765 article 254 para 2043 line 25 I have the right to sue the court for was ting my time like this

You cannot sue the court.


Go to sleep.

Prosecution witnesses won't show up anyway lol

 

[Rottkins]

milord this court has wasted my time over and over again without any reason whatsoever

I ask you to do just to me and my time

Oh no! Such blasphemy! What have they done tou you, my knight? I need to better know to better give judgement

 

[AL sama]

Oh no! Such blasphemy! What have they done tou you, my knight? I need to better know to better give judgement

@Reborn

 

[Finalbeta]

I am Attorney General. My power based on 5 digit IQ runs deep.

Remember that human laws are only made possible thanks to the laws of physics Reborn kun.

 

[AL sama]

You cannot sue the court.

Statute of Temporal Restitution and Judicial Accountability Act
Section 765 · Article 254 · Paragraph 2043 · Line 25


Right to Litigate for Time Waste (TL-25 Clause)


§254.2043.25
In recognition of the sanctity of time as a finite and non-renewable resource, and in acknowledgment that bureaucratic inefficiency is not a divine rite, any individual subjected to prolonged, unnecessary, or comically redundant legal proceedings shall possess the full and unmitigated right to initiate legal action against the Court itself under the following provisions:


(a) The term “waste of time” shall be defined as:
(i) any hearing that could have been an email;
(ii) trials delayed due to coffee breaks exceeding 45 minutes;
(iii) proceedings extended by irrelevant objections, circular arguments, or sheer dramatic flair by court officials;
(iv) the use of twelve continuances to resolve a matter of parking violations.


(b) Upon establishing a prima facie case of judicial time-wastage, the complainant shall be entitled to seek:
(i) compensatory damages, calculated by the Hourly Existential Frustration Index (HEFI);
(ii) reimbursement for all snacks consumed out of boredom during proceedings;
(iii) emotional damages multiplied by the number of times the phrase “We’ll reconvene after lunch” was uttered.


(c) The Court shall, upon conviction, be sentenced to mandatory efficiency seminars, and all gavel-striking privileges shall be temporarily revoked for not less than 30 days.


(d) This clause may not be dismissed on the grounds of “That’s just how the system works,” as such defense is considered inadmissible under the Temporal Integrity Preservation Protocol (TIPP Act of 2042).

 

[AL sama]

Oh no! Such blasphemy! What have they done tou you, my knight? I need to better know to better give judgement

@AL sama is right.
Time to end this mess, if @Rej don't show up in one hour, I gonna push for closing statements.
I assume your last post was your closing statement? @hime prepare for a closing statement.

My pc is broken, I cant write essays or show proofs.

All I know is that @AL sama is a hoe.

I hope justice wins, whoever represents it.

@Tyki_Mikk

Truly… the kind of airtight legal argument that would make even Phoenix Wright vomit into his cravat.
Your PC may be broken, Rej, but clearly so is your contribution to this trial. You were called as a witness, not a drunken uncle at a barbecue.

What exactly are we supposed to do with this?
"AL is a hoe" is that legal terminology? A moral stance? A Zodiac sign?


At this point, I’m not sure if you’re testifying or just trying to beat the Discord cooldown timer.

To the Jury and Court:

I called for witnesses. I summoned those who had suffered. Those with insight.
What I received instead was a parade of vague vibes, dramatic monologues, and now… broken hardware and name-calling.


Frankly?


I am disappointed in every single one of you.
You were meant to be pillars of truth, and instead you’ve given me:

• Narration instead of testimony.
• Vibes instead of evidence.
• And now @Rej who might as well have written his post on a napkin in crayon.

This court demands order.

We will now move to the Closing Statements.

I call upon:

• The Prosecution (@hime , @TheKnightOfTheSea ) – To summarize your charges and arguments, and convince the jury that AL Sama is guilty beyond all memeable doubt.
• The Defense (aka @AL sama himself and @Reborn ) – To rise, defend yourself, and explain to us why you shouldn’t be banished to the horny shadow realm forever.

Make it count.
The jury’s faith is hanging by a thread.
And I, your Judge, have just about lost mine in all of you.


Court is still in session.
Do better.

judge, we implore you to extend this court session just once more, despite the delays that have already taken place.
For @hime has not called upon all their witnesses yet.

L

Aye!

I am ready.

Waiting for prosecution closing statement which I hope won't take ages this time.

Your Honor, respectfully, the witness' statement stands! In fact it speaks volumes as to @AL sama 's personality and gives the jury plenty of information into his actions.

By providing the court testimony on how @AL sama is a whore, @Rej has given context into why @AL sama makes his horny ass thumbnails! It's because he secretly likes to feed off the energy of weeb simps! This is absolutely unacceptable conduct for a mod of our forum. Where else can simps and weebs live their lives in peace and not be preyed upon by the evil whore @AL sama who tries to bait them into viewing his content? This is outrageous!!!

Very well.

Against my better judgment, and despite this trial already dragging on longer than a One Piece arc with a filler flashback inside a filler flashback…
This Court shall grant one final extension.
But let it be known:

⚠️ This is the last one. No more delays. No more “my witness is asleep” or “I dropped my phone in ramen.”​

The prosecution has had more time than @Oda takes to reveal Dragon powerlvl. If @hime still has witnesses to summon, do it now or forever hold your case together with fan theories and vibes.
I expect the final testimonies to be delivered within the next phase of court and then we proceed directly to closing statements.
This isn’t a tea party. It’s a courtroom.
The people demand resolution. The memes demand blood.


Court will stand in recess briefly. When we return, we move to the final phase.
Use your time wisely.

see for yourself milord

 

[EkkoLoJinx]

The prosecution would now like to call @Peroroncino and @EkkoLoJinx to the stand.

@Peroroncino what were your experiences with @AL sama like? If you'd like to tell the jury about how @AL sama 's horny ass thumbnails have affected your life or the lives of others, please feel free to do so at this time.

@EkkoLoJinx being a tech-y person, I hope you can offer some insight into the recent series of forum outages. My question for you is simple, did these outages start around the start of the sign up thread for this trial?

im temporary out of service. reach out to @Dr_Professor83 or @Alexis2282AE or @MangoSenpai or @Crying bc no Cryo who i appoint as worthy replacements

 

[hime]

im temporary out of service. reach out to @Dr_Professor83 or @Alexis2282AE or @MangoSenpai or @Crying bc no Cryo who i appoint as worthy replacements

-_-

@Dr_Professor83 @Crying bc no Cryo please answer yes/no to whether or not the forum was down a lot a week to a week and a half ago

 

[CoC: Color of Clowns]

@Tyki_Mikk

You didn't even disagree with him

Let the record stand that AL is, in fact, a hoe.

:risicheck:

Better than being a clown, tho... probably???

I think he's also secretly a closeted furry with a sadistic fetish for banning other furries

 

[Dr_Professor83]

-_-

@Dr_Professor83 @Crying bc no Cryo please answer yes/no to whether or not the forum was down a lot a week to a week and a half ago

Whichever answer sabotages Al is correct

 

[hime]

Whichever answer sabotages Al is correct

(Yes)

 

[Mr. Reloaded]

I think he's also secretly a closeted furry with a sadistic fetish for banning other furries

Eradication of furries is not a crime

tell him @Dr_Professor83

 

[Finalbeta]

im temporary out of service. reach out to @Dr_Professor83 or @Alexis2282AE or @MangoSenpai or @Crying bc no Cryo who i appoint as worthy replacements

I tagged you in my sciencey post and you didn't reply, probably didn't even read it q_q

Can I call you Kekkologic from now on?

 

[EkkoLoJinx]

I tagged you in my sciencey post and you didn't reply, probably didn't even read it q_q

Can I call you Kekkologic from now on?

im out of town. missed tonnes of tags tbf. tag me again

sure

 

[Finalbeta]

im out of town. missed tonnes of tags tbf. tag me again

sure

If you are a being from the 4D spatial dimension you could steal objects from a closet without opening it or perform surgery without performing cuts and you could traverse 4D spacetime by circumventing its 3D spatial structure as long as your laws of physics would permit so.

But a piece of paper only looks 2D yet is fundamentally 3D, even at the molecular and atomic sizes (remember that an atom in modern physics is not conceived as billiard ball-like, but rather it's defined by the spatial extent of its electron cloud. Quantum mechanical wave functions are used to compute "electron probability clouds" and the "size" of an atom is effectively the region where these electron clouds are most probable to be found. For instance, for a hydrogen atom in its ground state, the most probable distance for the one electron from the nucleus is the Bohr radius (approximately 5.29×10−11 meters)).

Speculating about 4D while 2D remains illusory is what ningen love to do.

True 2D would require an object to have no depth and while fundamental particles are treated as point-like in quantum field theory the general consensus is that this is an approximation. @EkkoLoJinx

Edit Note: I'm preparing for the next Trial round.

 

[CoC: Color of Clowns]

Eradication of furries is not a crime

tell him @Dr_Professor83

"First they came for the Furries, but, I did not speak, because I was a Scaly

And then I came, because I was gooning to Interspecies Reviewers"

Zunesha will always resist you Lesser Minks.

No fur, so you have to wear clothes. No tails.

Pathetic. WITH MY DITTO SERUM, I WILL BANG OVER NINE THOUSAND MILTANKS

Can you say that? Can you say "Bang over nine thousand Miltanks" on WorstGen? Without getting banned?

...We'll we're gonna fucking find out

 

[ElderOnitar]

we can't be replacing witnesses, too late for that.

 

[Reborn]

@Tyki_Mikk

Your honour,

The prosecution's failure to produce their own listed witness undermines the credibility of their case.

This is their 3rd witness in a row who either failed to give testimony or didn't show up.

This absence cannot be casually dismissed or substituted.

Allowing the prosecution to replace a key witness midway violates the principle of fair trial and prejudices the defense irreparably. These violates principle of natural justice.


The court must not allow fishing expeditions to continuously give leeway to prosecution to do damage control for their incompetence in managing this case.

Not only they didn't counter my opening statements, even after your extension, nothing happened from their side.


I, request your honour @Tyki_Mikk and respected jury to end this drama from prosecution and hold them accountable for their actions. It's time we should move to closing statements and end this trial and do justice with my client who's going through mental torture and defamation every day because of this.

Thank you

 

[CoC: Color of Clowns]

Like I wanted the prosecution to DESTROY AL, and...

Besides @hime who's a real one, WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE EVEN DOING HERE?

WE ALL KNOW AL IS GUILTY, THE MAN IS A SHANK'S STAN

The others Mods?

@AL sama blackmailed them into being his slaves, WE NEED YOU TO TAKE HIM DOWN, PROSECUTION

This Shanks' stan is trying to enslave the entire forum, and ya'll are posting Mink titties

Whoops, that was me, but, still, SHAME ON ALL OF YOU FOR NOT ATTACKING AL FOR BANNING US FOR BEING CRAZY GOONER TRASH

GOD
[automerge]1751849673[/automerge]

@Tyki_Mikk

Your honour,

The prosecution's failure to produce their own listed witness undermines the credibility of their case.

This is their 3rd witness in a row who either failed to give testimony or didn't show up.

This absence cannot be casually dismissed or substituted.

Allowing the prosecution to replace a key witness midway violates the principle of fair trial and prejudices the defense irreparably. Those violates principle of natural justice.


The court must not allow fishing expeditions to continuously giving leeway to prosecution to do damage control for their incompetence in managing this case.

Not only they didn't counter my opening statements, even after your extension, nothing happened from their side.


I, request your honour @Tyki_Mikk and respected jury to end this drama from prosecuting and hold them accountable for their actions. It's time we should move to closing statements and end this trial and do justice with my client who's going through mental torture and defamation every day because of this.

Thank you

If you give me Wanda and a Gallon of Peanut Butter I can create new witnesses

I was about to say "how haven't I been on Trial yet?"

But then I remembered I was found guilty and relocated into Zunesha's stomach



You know why AL's ass is guilty?

Because the fucker ignored the jury last trial, why the fuck did we put someone who has no respect for the law, and disregarded the Jury in the past trial, in a case in the first place?

AL clearly thinks he's above the law, we need to send the Jedi after him

Get him, Obi-Wan

To the furries, AL-sama is nothing more than a ban-happy terrorist

Sure, I killed @Mr. Reloaded 's ex wife, but I would never BAN FURRIES FOR SMUT

...

Huh, maybe I should be in jail

Fuck it

Take me away, Choppers